ask for more

Practice asking for the things you typically wouldn’t ask for.

Practice asking during the moments you have a habit of staying quiet.

Ask for the extra sauce when you order food or ask to be seated at a different table, simply because you want to sit somewhere else.

Practice asking customer service if they have the item you want but can’t find. If you notice you were overcharged, practice inquiring as to why.

Request something absurd so you can be surprised by the outcome.

Asking for extra sauce or help may feel insignificant, but each time you practice asking for your needs, you get better and better at standing up for yourself when it matters.

I went to a chiropractic clinic where every appointment came with a soft tissue massage to loosen your body for the adjustment. I had a scheduled appointment, but because someone else was late for theirs, the doctor didn’t have time to do the soft tissue work. Ordinarily, I would have just nodded and said okay, but I was looking forward to the massage portion, so I spoke up.

The doctor adjusted me, maintained his usual schedule, and then the assisting massage therapist came in afterward. It may have been slightly less convenient, but it wasn’t a big deal. More importantly, I stood up for myself; I asked for my wants.

Asking for the things you want, asking for expectations to be met, asking for help are the easiest ways to stand up for yourself. It’s also a great way to boost your, and the person who is assisting, moods’.

Asking will often result in a chain of positive reactions.

When someone asks you for help and you have the power to assist them, it makes you feel good. Everyone leaves the interaction a little more uplifted; we carry that energy throughout the rest of our day.

Practice advocating for yourself by asking for the little things, like extra sauce, so that it is that much easier when it comes to the big things, like your salary.

Employers expect 100% of applicants to negotiate wages; they always lowball. Even the non-profit my friend applied to assured her over and over they didn’t have any more in their budget, but then they actually did.

Practice feeling comfortable asking for your needs, then start asking for your wants.

So start asking for the little things. Start speaking up. Start advocating for yourself.

Be curious about what you can ask for; take a leap of faith and ask.